From Then to 1) Religion

OK, clearly this is going to be all about religion, but there needs to be a brief background first.  My religious journey started as a kid, watching my dad, the Preacher, from the pulpit, but that was an exercise in observation at best.  My personal journey started strangely and a young age.  Time for the backstory.

When I was very young, my parents took me to a few doctors.  These doctors performed specific tests, trying to see my rate of growth, how my brain worked, my motor skills, etc.  From what I understand, not all children went through this poke and prod?  News to me..anyways...  I was diagnosed with one or two interesting "ailments" but was medicated for ADHD.  It's like standard ADD if the kid is addicted to crack.    This was pretty successful at making me vegetative in the classroom, preventing me from accosting my teachers.  The danger came up when my medication was discontinued, forcibly introducing me to my first adversary - depression - in the form of a tiny yellow pill with tiny writing on it reading "alza 18" known commonly as Concerta.

Check out this website for Concerta Side Effects.  You may notice in the severe side effects mood changes and whatnot.  It also says to contact the doctor IMMEDIATELY if this should occur.  For some reason, we waited a few weeks, maybe a month or so.  I found myself in the deepest depression I have ever entered to this day.  I lost a lot of weight, found no enjoyment in things I used to love - you usually see symptoms like this plaguing adults in a midlife crisis; this is me prior to puberty - this should have never happened.  I found myself thinking on death daily..  "what happens when I die?" ..  "will I be able to think or feel anything?" ..  I started having dreams in which I died and went to a blanket of darkness so thick, I could feel it on my skin.  What made this worse was my birthday.

My birthday would in any other case make all things better at that age, but this year, it was on Easter weekend. And nothing helps a kid with meds induced depression more than watching a guy die in agony on a cross.  When he screamed out 'why have you forsaken me', I ran to the lockers outside.  My mom found me shaking and yeah..there ends the sob story.

I can't seem to forget that day, so when I became older, with the means to read different scriptures, I pursued every direction I could.  Because of that day, I had to know what is real.

More to come...